Going forward and backward (3 weeks, 4 days)

(Note: This is almost a week old and is what I was working on when my G4 gave its last gasp.)

Sorry, no new photos of Zeke today. Even without having a photo, though, I had to write about what a great day we had (I had) yesterday. Yesterday felt like a real milestone, even without too much having happened.

First, Zeke and I went out into the world yesterday without Aaron. I had to sit in the front seat and drive the car myself and everything. We went to the monthly mother's group at a local church and sponsored by the hospital. The group sometimes goes over specific developmental information, but mainly just gives mothers a chance to pose questions about their babies and maybe do a little socializing. There were 10 other mother-child pairs there and Zeke was the youngest baby there. I asked one question, but mainly just watched all the other mothers and babies.

One of the things that is really interesting for me is how motherhood has put me into a whole new and sometimes unexpected context for meeting new people. Somehow, you really can go without knowing other people who have experiences that you can share and learn from. For me, I really hadn't been around on a regular basis any women who were pregnant or have infants, so there was this gap of firsthand knowledge. In the past year, though, I have found myself involved in entirely new social circumstances. For example, I have participated in a few online communities, made friends through those communities, gotten to know people through classes, etc. It's really unusual for me to consider how many new people have entered my life other than just Zeke!

Watching the other mothers was interesting, just to see how babies react to certain interactions and seeing how mothers hold their babies in certain ways or do real lightening fast diaper changes or the like. I had a good laugh (on the inside) at the gear that these moms had, too. Obviously, everyone there seemed to belong to a certain demographic and had similar tastes. Outside of a Babies R Us, I had never seen so many similar baby things all together. If the dyad came with a stroller, they had a Peg Perego (the Benz or Lexus of baby gear) or a car seat carrier. If they had a car seat, again it was a Peg Perego or a Graco Snugride in the Blackwell pattern (the one we have). Including us, there were FIVE identical carseats. FIVE! And one of them even had the exact same rattle attached to the handle as I had put on Zeke's. When I got back and told Aaron, he asked if I was sure I brought home the right baby and car seat. I might have been a little underclass if I had brought my Maclaren in the room!

It was interesting and I'll go back next month. But, when we got home, we had the topper for a great day. No colicky fits. No crying when pooping. No crying when changing the diaper. A need to feed every 3 hours exactly. Just lots of wide-eyed looks and being cute and NO fits. I can see how you start learning a routine and be confident about meeting the baby's needs. I can almost even begin to imagine when this becomes fun! Now, if I can just build up the courage (and pumped milk supply) to be away from him, we'll really have come a long way from that first week. I don't remember the last time I spent so much continuous time with one person...It was probably when I was with my mom as a baby! Zeke and I have not been separated for more than an hour since he was born.

Then today we went out again into the world and I nursed while out there. It wasn't really in public, but almost. I nursed Zeke in the car while Aaron was running an errand. I consider it a practice run for when we really take this show on the road. A couple more practice runs and Zeke learning to control that big head of his and I think we will be ready. I was really feeling confident.

Of course, I got overconfident after that good day. Zeke had been seeming so much less fussy. Aaron made cookies, though, and I refused to drink the goat's milk we bought. (Remember that I had given up milk when Zeke's gas was really bad.) The goat's milk isn't bad for cooking, but that slightly grassy aftertaste prevents me from drinking it straight. I had 8 oz of cow's milk. Things went bad that next day on Saturday and Zeke seemed colicky all day. Ah -- I poisoned my own child! So, now I'm back to no milk and waiting for the milk proteins to get out of our systems if that is in fact the culprit.

So, good days, bad days. Two steps forward, one step back. Welcome to motherhood, Jamie!