I'm truly grateful...

...and I mean it. This was our Thanksgiving 2008. Gobble gobble, turkeys.

Things for which I am grateful...

...NOT! Zeke developed a list of endearing habits, talents and interests in the past few months that require a little sarcasm. I can put all of this in perspective and know how blessed we are with good fortune and a good kid. Still, a few things make me take a deep breath.

• Zeke figured out how to open the refrigerator and take things out by himself.
• Zeke figured out how to open most doors in the house and even some of the simple locks. He did lock me out of the house at least once this summer when I was out on the deck (though I did have my keys on me).
• Zeke did start jumping in July -- a physical milestone I was looking for him to hit. It quickly became leaping and then it became bounding and then bouncing on couches and steps and chairs and anything else vaguely dangerous. It all required the purchase of a trampoline that takes up a good deal of floor space, but is good for redirection.
• Zeke has to touch things with his feet, including the dog. I don't think it is malice, just a form of dominance. It says something along the lines of "I touch you with my feet and you shall obey me." He also does this to anyone that sits next to him at meals. I keep trying to tell him "Gentle feet" or "NO KICKING!" but I may just have to wait for this phase to be done.
• Zeke picked up the habit from someone in the family, a four year old that shall remain nameless to protect the innocent, of exclaiming, "NOT!" in response to many things. It works in the four year old's family and it is funny. It can drive me nuts when Zeke does it, though, especially when he says it after I mention for the 11th time that it is time to take a nap or stop kicking the dog. I appreciate the irony.

Getting to Work

I have been trying to encourage Zeke's independence to some sort of energy that is more positive. Normally his independence manifests itself in his trademarked catchphrases of "No no no no no no no!" and "You not do that" and the slightly more tolerable "Now it's my turn." I'm trying to make it work for me. Here is Zeke putting his energy and independence to some recent Friday tasks, as if they were his ideas: loading the washer and making dinner.

Getting in on the act

We had a few Halloween activities this year: Halloween, the neighborhood Halloween Parade and one dress up opportunity. It made me wonder: what was Halloween like when it was just Halloween Night? Anyway, the Parade is always good fun because it is pretty low key, short and focused on young children. Families parade through the park and then at the end, play, listen to music and storytelling, and eat stuff from the bake sale and hot dog stand. This year, I decided to get on the act and dress up as an accessory to Zeke's lion costume. I was worried I would feel a little silly as I have not worn a costume for Halloween for two decades, but it went over well and was fun. (If you can't quite tell from the photos, I am a lion tamer complete with right-sized chair and whip and circus top hat.) In truth, I think a chair and whip should be standard training gear for most of the toddlers I know.

My Favorite Halloween Photo

Pancakes, pizza and our friend P.

(Note: Watch out ahead. There is a meandering intro that unexpectedly veers to something completely different.)

This summer, I got a call from a political campaign and I committed to a contribution. Part of the information required was my occupation. During the course of conversation, Zeke had gotten involved and was making quite a racket, causing an off-topic polite conversation about children wherein I shared that I stay at home with Zeke full-time. So, when we got to the end of the conversation and he needed the info about my employment, he said, "I'll put in 'housewife'."

Housewife.

Housewife?

That was a heavy moment as it is a mildly antiquated term and I don't think I've ever thought of myself as a housewife. (Bravo, though, is working triple time to get us all to talk about housewives. ) I don't even think of myself as a "stay at home mom" or "SAHM" but I guess I prefer that because it focuses expectations on my raising my kid and not on my keeping a perfect house. ('Cause that ain't happening-- it's just not.) My transition to my current "career" has had a few bumps along the way. Mainly those bumps are just from me running over and trying to leave behind: unreasonable expectations about how/what I should do, an inability to let go entirely of past choices, and ridiculous concerns about what I will do in the future for a career. I am remarkably happier and healthier than I have ever been before, and, keeping that in mind, I have been able to get over those bumps. I am good if you want to call me a "housewife" or "just a mom."

I find a new satisfaction particularly in the habits of domesticity that being a housewife (there, I said it) and mom afford me. A few years ago, I don't think I felt like domestic skills were really a strongpoint for me as they weren't something I was taught, but now they are improving. I even get a little geeked out by taking out a bad stain or washing diapers. For the most part, I am enjoying learning and doing new things at home and creating routines that are nurturing and even yummy. For example, I take great enjoyment in some family eating habits that really took hold this summer. We really enjoy these things and I don't know that I would have done them without the benefit of my new career path.

The first is Pancake Sunday. This summer was filled (at least once a week) with homemade pancakes, the best with fresh local berries. I have always thought myself pretty terrible at making pancakes as I have never had enough patience to flip the pancake at the right time...or to make batter...or get up on Sundays. I like the recipe from an old Joy of Cooking, but have experimented with recipes for pancakes with buttermilk, corn, savory (veggie) ham and cheese, fruit and cheese, and grated veggies. Pancake Sunday is also a great excuse to get some folks to come and eat with us without the pressure of having cook them dinner. I used to like brunch out -- the most toddler friendly meal out -- but now prefer staying home. I'm working on get a nice restaurant looking pancake now, as well making pancake letters. If I skip a Sunday for some reason, I will make pancakes for dinner one night that following week. That is almost better than Pancake Sunday!

Here are some good pancakes made with blueberries Zeke and I went to pick in July with friends.

Here is Zeke and his typical reaction to pancakes: stuff as much as possible in your mouth. He can eat as many pancakes as I can. (Oh, this picture is from this summer, but it seems so long ago. Zeke is eating at his high chair and drinking from a sippy cup in this photo, two things he really doesn't do now.)

The other new habit that is a real hit with Zeke and Aaron is Friday Pizza Night. I make a thin crust pizza dough, turn up the oven really high and dump anything on it that is in the fridge. Typically, I make one cheese pizza and then experiment with the other, though I have been a little stuck recently. I really like a pizza with olives, capers, zucchini and veggie bacon. I've promised Aaron that I would make something different this week though. In the new year, I might try making my own sauce, so if you have suggestions, let me know. We don't invite people over for Pizza Night, Halloween being the exception: just not enough left overs.

On Fridays, I ask Zeke what we are doing for dinner and he says, "PIZZA NIGHT!" This is Zeke enjoying pineapple and veggie ham pizza.

I occasionally suggest other "days" that help me plan the week's menu, but they just haven't taken off yet. For example, "Let Your Husband Make Dinner" Sunday. Breadmaking also hasn't gotten far. I'm toying with a "Soup Monday." Even as I write this, I think, are you really reading this and questioning why I am into this day to day stuff? It probably won't help my case to say that all of my holiday gift requests to my husband have been kitchen related: a bakestone, a gridle, cookbooks.

Finally, one of our very favorite food routines this summer was eating dinner almost every week at our good friend P.'s house.  While they are not vegetarians, they always accommodate us, and it so nice to eat at a house that isn't messy like ours. Plus, they eat so well that 1) it always pushes me to find recipes that aren't too dependent on carbs, dairy or soy -- ingredients I have always leaned a little too heavily on as a vegetarian -- and 2) they make delish stuff! Zeke and his pal P. play together, sometimes through the meal, while the adults get to talk and do not have to apologize for toddler behavior. Really wonderful and I can't thank P.'s mom enough for organizing our dinners together.

Here is photo evidence of my being a bad dinner guest! P. doesn't eat sweets and is the only child I know with a taste for things like nori. Still, one night I brought dessert (gasp!) with lots of sugar and chocolate (gasp! faint!) You can see P. approved. I felt like the serpent in the garden.

 

Engaged

I wrote recently about Zeke heading out for a play and then playing with his friends from school in the lobby. I tried to take a photo of the festivities, but my camera phone couldn't keep up with the action. Here is old friend P. racing towards a glass display case that was something like "home base." After touching base, the boys would run back to these chairs and say, "Good night" (we did just see Goodnight Moon) and then pretend to sleep. This is what Zeke is doing in the photo.

Zeke also got a hug and kiss -- a couple even -- from one of the girls in class that he talks about all the time. She is such a petite thing (she weighs almost half of what my toddler monster does), but she makes up for it with presence of personality. Apparently she is not the only one in her family with flair. Little Ms. R. was there with her whole family including two big sisters. One of her sisters watched as the two little ones squeezed and then kissed. She then told us: "You know, now you have to get married."

It starts so early.

Halloween Night

Ta-dah! Here are the photos of our little lion this Halloween. We started off the evening by having our neighbors over for a pizza dinner. The kids had mini pizzas that were supposed to look like mummies and pumpkin shaped pumpkin cakes. Afterwards, we hit the streets to trick or treat with the cul de sac's Spider Man and Princess. We all had a good time, though the boys got a bit spooked by a very well decorated house and then by an older kid dressed as the Grim Reaper who shouted "Boo!" at them. (Man, if I could get my hands on that kid....) Zeke and his pals seemed to get the idea of trick or treating, though it took a little practice. At the first few houses, Zeke tried going inside. It makes sense: that is probably what we would do any other day. By the end, the kids were pretty sharp saying, "Trick or treat" and then leaving with a "Thank you. Goodbye. Happy Halloween Day."

Here is my sweet stuff.

Running to catch up with (or just catch?) Spider Man

Beauty and the Beast: Holding paws with the neighbor girl

Part of our little motley crew of trick or treaters, including Grandma the Pirate.

Savoring the fruit of his night's work: a cherry cola dum-dum

Here Comes Santa Claus

I'm already a little weary of Christmas carols and decorations and sales. However, I'm glad for the return of some holiday traditions, like taking the Big Z to see the same Santa for the third time. We also enjoyed being able to share the afternoon one of Zeke's oldest friends and his family, also visiting Santa. We'll get the official photo next week, but here are the behind the scenes shots in the meantime.

Here is the obligatory primping of Zeke. He was a pretty good sport as I spent the entire time in line adjusting and straightening his clothes, smoothing down his cowlick, and wiping his face. I promise I used no spit. (You can also see my new "short" haircut -- about four inches cut off.)

Here are some of the shots we took. No smiles, no interaction with Santa, no cute beard pulling like the first year. However, there was also none of the commotion that we had last year when Zeke was in the full throes of stranger anxiety. The ennui is apparent, then maybe a little disapproval in the last. Just kidding. I just have to say this Santa is such a kind gentleman -- he takes generous time with each child and is so kind no matter the situation.

A little bit of candy cane to celebrate the passing of a tradition for another year. Even this didn't get too much of a smile!

My little pumpkin

One of my favorite pictures from Zeke's first year is of him sitting on the steps with our jack-o-lanterns. Therefore, he can expect to have to do this every year until...until whenever I can force him to do it no more. This year he got into it and tried to go for appropriate Halloween lighting.

Here are the daytime close ups. This is Aaron's.

This is Zeke's (as carved by me). Once again, Aaron carved a more traditional scary one, while I had the goofy jack-o-lantern territory covered. I called this Zeke's Charlie Brown pumpkin. As we stood in front of a display of lovely picture perfect pumpkins, I told Zeke he could pick out any one that he wanted. Somehow, he found a misshapen white one with no stem. I tried to redirect, but he threatened public meltdown if he didn't get that one. I kept my word and he got the odd pumpkin (which turned the right way wasn't too oddly shaped).

My partisan Pumpkin for Change.

Firsties

I wrote so little this summer that I have a stockpile of tidbits never recorded, so have lots of good stuff that I could share. The flip side of that is that I have so many things to record that it is hard to know how to catch up. Have to just do it if I am going to do it, though, eh?

Here are some firsts from the past few months. I'll probably have to update this a few times before I get everything down.

• Zeke, my little culture vulture, went to see his first stage production, a musical adaptation of Good Night Moon. It was delightful. Not quite what I was expecting -- a little more high energy than you would expect given how soporific the book is -- but all of the children really enjoyed it. The children's behavior was also not quite what expected --all of the little ones were entranced, listened and clapped at all the right parts. The night we saw it Zeke wanted to read Good Night Moon and a week later still asks to read it at least once a day. Also making it an especially nice event: it was free. One of the moms from Zeke's school is working on the production and opened the final rehearsal to all of the school families. Interestingly enough, most of the families that attended were families we knew and even though it was late, we let the children take over the lobby of the Woodruff Arts Center for a little while and have some fun together. The show is open for another week, so there is still time to go!

• Zeke watched a movie for the first time this summer. I'm not saying that he hasn't watched things for more than an hour; it is just that it is usually that he was watching one half hour video twice. Zeke's first feature length movie was Babe, one of my favorite children's movies. You know, the one that makes it look perfectly common sense not to eat adorable pigs, especially the kind talking ones that herd sheep. I was thinking Zeke might not see it until that day in the future when he asks why we eat veggie bacon and ham, but we got an early start of it. I just love it: "That'll do, pig." (Side note: I used to work with a woman in her sixties and she and her husband said that to each other as an endearment. I found this very charming, but more than a little odd, too.) Recently, Zeke has also seen Monsters, Inc. and now he wants to see that everyday.

• Zeke also took his first really really long road trip. (The standard trip being the eight hours it takes to get to our family to the south and our family to the north.) We drove up to Chicago last month and Zeke got to go through a couple of new states: Tennessee, Kentucky, Indiana and Illinois. He was so good the whole trip, that I am almost willing to forgive him the whining stage that he has entered this week. No more long trips for awhile...or until next month.

• Zeke got to go see fireworks for the first time. Rather, he got to see fireworks that weren't being lit by a neighbor, something that happens at least twice a year. Anyway, I've always been a little anxious about braving big city crowds on the Fourth of July (yes, I know this was four months ago), so have skipped going out for fireworks despite how much I love them. I got a little more gutsy this year and we rode the train over to Decatur. A total twofer: a train ride and fireworks.

• Zeke had his first music lesson...kinda. A family friend teaches violin using the Suzuki method and was starting a group for little ones. We went to check a sample lesson out and Zeke loved it. For days after, he would plead, "More violence, Mommy! More violence!" However, the commute to class was too much and required that I go further than three miles around the house I like to call my comfort zone. Even in a hybrid, it seemed like too much gas to use. I always wanted to take music lessons as a child, so I hope I am not projecting onto my child too much, but I think Zeke and I will both enjoy him taking music lessons eventually.

More as I think of them!

Pirate Treasure

ARRRRRGH! Kids these days like pirates. Just think: how many pirates came to your door a week ago on Halloween? Honestly, our neighborhood Halloween parade looked like a kids' casting of Pirates of the Caribbean. Zeke is not immune. Zeke's interest began with an episode of Backyardigans with some catchy songs. He doesn't watch Backyardigans anymore, but still asks to see this episode. I know it is a popular episode and had that confirmed when I was out canvassing last week and a member of my canvassing team started humming part of the episode. Nick Jr no longer has a clip online, but if you go to YouTube you can find dozens of kids singing songs from the episode and asking, "What do you do with a scurvy pirate?"

I bought a pirate hat last week from a Halloween display and the hat has been everywhere since then.

A pirate enjoys the live music at the farmer's market. (Those are produce-shaped shakers provided by the band.) Pirates are infamous for their love of guitars and local eating.

A pirate takes a bath, because being a pirate is a dirty job.

Zeke defends our Halloween decorated porch from another pirate (i.e., the kid from a few doors down who has a very serious thing for pirates). Not pictured: Captain Z. makes him walk the plank.

Literalist

Yesterday we made a quick trip to our great local bookstore. I was really lucky and found a used copy of a book that I have been looking for. After buying the book for almost nothing and the kind bookseller put the book in a bag, I asked Mr. Toddler if he would carry the bag. This is pretty typical -- when we are out running errands, I give him small tasks that help keep him occupied. This limits interest in running into traffic or creating small property disturbances, both things that might reflect poorly on my maternal skills. Zeke says, "Sure" and takes the bag off the counter. He can be such an obedient kid.

Then, he stops for a moment, dumps the book out of the bag, and barrels towards the door with the bag. 

I'm thinking I should be more specific in my next request.

Schoolboy

Last month, Zeke started his second year of preschool. As you know, this was to our mutual great relief. It still seems a stretch to call it "school" as he still only goes two days a week for a few hours at a time. 

These are a few shots of him modeling his school gear from before school today. You can see his lunchbox which held up from last year. It is an Americanized bento box and I have become entirely too interested in bento boxes. (I may write a separate post on this at a later date. We now have a small collection of bento gear and cookbook, but I have slowed down now. I stopped myself mid-order of the most awesome Totoro bento stuff when I realized I should not order my 2 year old a lunchbox from Japan.) Two other boys in his class have the identical lunchbox, so now his has a little dog luggage tag on it. One of the teachers say that the three boys like to sit together at lunch. I wonder whether they think they are supposed to or whether they should.

My favorite addition this year is the backpack. Again, completely unnecessary, but too cute to resist. The same line includes backpacks with a bunny, panda, polar bear, lion, shark and squirrel. I'm still trying to figure out what one to order for myself. Really -- don't I deserve stuff this cute? As a sidenote, I feel of late like I have been shouldering the entire American economy (at least kids' stuff). Being at home gives me too much time to think of stuff to buy. Like a backpack for a 2 year old who never needs to carry stuff -- that is why he has me after all. It is entirely gratifying that Zeke likes his backpack as much as I do. He has to wear it the 10 feet from the front door to the car.

Z. did not warm up to school as quickly as he did to his school gear, though. I thought we might skip that period of adjustment, but no. For the first month, he was various stages of unhappy when I left him, though always calmed down and had a good day. Luckily he is always excited to go to school and willingly goes, shouting over his shoulder at the door, "Bye, Maggie! I see you later. I go to school. See you later, alligator!" I think the adjustment might have been due in part to switching preschools. We loved loved his school last year and his teacher comes over now to babysit occasionally. However, I was looking ahead and not excited about the older classrooms. I wanted more communication with the school and a clearer alignment with our views. One perfect example of many: on the last day of school, Zeke was a mess. I don't care -- I send him to school so he can be messy there and not at my house. The teacher apologized and explained they had eaten ice cream. For the most part, no big deal and I didn't say anything. However, we had never given ice cream to our poor deprived offspring because as of that point we didn't give him many sweets and because we didn't give him dairy products. You know, LIKE it said on his student info sheet where we wrote, "NO DAIRY."

So, I started Zeke at another neighborhood preschool. I would have sent him there last year, but they don't take 1 year olds. This school has a curriculum for all of its classes (none of which have worksheets), a green schools commitment, and a very loose Waldorf orientation. (That is to say, they have a very homey environment and play with plain wood toys, but leave out the weird Steiner stuff.) The kids do lots of crafts, sew, sing, play in the dirt, and make communal snacks. Of late they have been making apple sauce and bread. Awesome -- I love that my kid is baking bread and will be glad for him to bake some at home. I like his class, but I really am head over in heels love with the older classrooms. The last time I went into the 4 year old class, the kids were making a bear cave and writing stories about being bears. Older kids also take yoga and Spanish. Next week, we have parent teacher meetings and every day they have a closing circle. Fits the bill for what I wanted. I also was really excited that two of Zeke's lifelong friends are in his class. He talks about them every school day, but also talks quite a bit about two other little girls. His teacher thinks he is friends with them because one is like a little mother to him and the other sings as loud as he does! And did I mention, this is for a little cheaper than the other school? Fingers crossed, I hope to keep our schoolboy here through kindergarten.

Layers

This boy has his own sense of style. Often he'll tell me what shirt he wants and almost everyday he picks his own shoes. He has been a little overwhelmed, though, by my recent going through of his clothes to prepare for the new season -- simply too many choices.

Last night at bedtime he insisted on picking out multiple layers from the drawer I was reorganizing. It is a little hard to see from my phone photo, but this is what he ended up with: Finding Nemo swim trunks, bug pj bottoms, blue cow t-shirt, all topped off with Hanna star pj top. He did try for more but just could not fit them over the base layers.

It was a little seasonally cool last night, but he did agree to remove at least two items before finally going to bed.

My little ray of light

It's on/off raining and pouring. My shoes got wet in a puddle, and rain got in my coffee. I spent all morning running errands that I thought would take an hour. I haven't gotten any chores done or eaten and now I need to pick Kidlet up at school in ten minutes. I'm starting to work on all the things necessary for our great migration North by car next week. Every song on the car radio sounds nostalgic and melancholy. The cashier at Target told me I need to perk up. Let me say that again...the cashier in the Deathstar of Capitalism just down the road told me to "perk up."


Deep breath. That's better.

Cheap entertainment

To remember before I buy the next expensive toy: $1.50 bag of balloons from drug store = couple hours of entertainment for busy toddlers

Fathers and sons

The Kid, his cousin and their dads at Papa's pond: talking turtles, skipping pecans.

Papa turns 90!

Back to what we do best: providing photos of my adorable kid. These are some photos of said kid and his Papa who we visited in NC to celebrate his 90th birthday. Zeke loves to talk about his Papa and definitely has a special relationship with him that he doesn't have with anyone else.